Looking at the sky through the trees, this was yesterday. Today is more ominous, gray. I am thankful it did not rain or snow yet. I love that most of the snow is gone. I still can’t get myself in gear, to take my trip tomorrow. My car is a mud pit. My son is an annoying brat, everything bores him. According to him, he needs $400 to buy a new game system. He only has 10 games for his current system, not nearly enough choice to get him out of boredom. My stories of playing outside when I was young, fighting over toys with my brothers and sister don’t even register in his comprehension. He got over that rant, and went to play at the neighbors. I first made him take care of the dog doodie that he is supposed to clean up. It does not bother him to step over it to get off the porch. He does not put two and two together, do some work and get paid for helping. Even though these small struggles bring me down, I know they are not the source of my anxiety. I don’t exactly know what is. Do I really forget to do important things, or do I just not want to do them? I am a bigger brat than my son. I am bored, yet I am not doing anything to make my life better.