The Start Of Fall Color in NY State

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This is a few hours south, across the street from a friends. I love the view she has. I miss the rolling hills I grew up around, and for a time owned a piece of while married. I now get my singleness thrown in my face. Enough to let me know how alone I am, and maybe forever. There is a new MeetUp group for singles in my area over 50. Yea sounds great and what I need to join. Problem is only two people are now members, the only guy (organizer) says he has a girlfriend. My online dating has been more of the same. Guys are either total fruit loops that need lifelong therapy (mental) not physical. Then there are the ones that email back and forth a few times, only to never be heard from again. Was it something I said? Did they finally read my crazy bio? I am going to change my online name and bio. It has survivor in it, and guys get the wrong idea. I am also taking out the “I had a stroke” blurb. I look much healthier than their beer barrel tank stomached, aged 20 years beyond their years bodies. Yes, I am being mean. I am overweight myself, but I don’t have a leathery face (yet). I might have another stroke, but I am conscious and try to be proactive to preventing that.

My son is at the middle school dance for a few hours. So, I feel extra alone. I am broke and have nowhere to go. No one to call to make plans for tomorrow. Are the violins too loud yet. I even make myself sick. Well, it is just temporary reflection. I will get over it. I know I will, it is supposed to be awesome weather for a week! First time all year it seems.

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