I have been putting myself in so many “normal” situations lately. I am burned out mentally and run down physically. I volunteered to sit in on my county legislative court, then I sat in child support court to no avail. I went on a “hike” that on the webite said easy and looked like a flat road, it turned out to be a steep ravine. I turned around after trying it a few 50′ or so. My affected leg kept catching on the roots. Later that night I drove to the emergency room, I had a tick on the back of my good arm. There was no way I could pluck it off. I also got a dose of antibiotic to prevent lyme disease. I realize I need to be more realistic in what I can and can not do. I try to mix and mingle with “normal” people. It is an epic fail. I went to the movies by myself today. I won’t give anything away, but Gravity to me was really sad. Well, no humans want to interact with me but this horse was curious when I pulled over. He moved closer to get a look at me. It might have just been my camera, or car he was looking at. He could have been lonely too, I did not see any other horses there.
In positive news, I had a haircut and I almost like it now. My neighbor told me today she likes my hair long. She has only known me a little over one year. I used to have really long hair. I am the same person long hair or short and walking normal or hobbling.
I still have had no luck with the online dating. I wish they had one for stroke patients only. I would probably strike out there too.
I am trying to be very careful not to waste my precious time. Trying to figure out State Child Support procedures is a waste of valuable time. It is necessary, but they have 5 different answers for my questions. It took me 5 phone calls to get through their help line. It actually hangs up on you if you do not know who to talk to. I went to my local county family court today. I got talked into using a handicapped elevator. I could have went insane as I was trapped at the bottom with the door not opening. I decided after several attempts not to go apeshit rioting and screaming and just rode back up. I thankfully let myself out and walked down the stairs. I learned that everything I was told on my phone call to the state was wrong. While the clerk took my question to her supervisor, I mentioned to the 5 security guys sitting around doing nothing how the elevator door did not open. Why should they care? I don’t give a fuck they don’t. I am just pissed they have good jobs doing nothing and still don’t care. I wonder evilly if they will ever have a stroke themselves and have to question what they now take for granted. The stroke has not made me more evil, just more often I have evil thoughts. I really am a nice person. I do say so myself.
On a totally unrelated note. I brought in some of my pepper and tomato plants to live inside until I kill them. They are just starting to produce, and I would hate to see them die outside. I just hope it does not get as cold inside as outside. I hope to make room for all my plants tomorrow. I have so much planned, I don’t know if that will happen.