It is hard work meeting new people


I think meeting people should be easy, and it is. Having new people care enough to stay in touch is the hard part. Sometimes I blame the stroke for causing my lack of friends. In reality, I always had trouble having close friends. I have been trying to find a soulmate for most of my adult life now. Where the fuck is he? I am not getting any younger, just lonelier and lonelier.

I have had sticks in my firepit for months now. It mostly has been too wet to burn. I would like friends to come over and sit around the fire with me. Last year my ex said he would….but, he never did. Now when I sit out there I can feel doubly bad. While I am out there I can see and hear all the motorcycles go by. That makes me think of the time the ex said he would come pick me up for a motorcycle ride. That never happened either. What ever happened to only saying things if you mean it. Am I the only one that is naive enough to wait hoping things guys say they will do happen? I wasted over 25 of my best years waiting for two other exes to live up to their talk too. Of course when history keeps repeating itself, shame on me for not learning my lesson.