My Favorite Color Electric Blue

img_0855

Actually sky blue is my favorite, I just wanted to be punny.  I finally took a long for me walk…meaning over a mile. Our winter has been mild. It has been above freezing often. It has been like a cool summer day or warm spring day in February. Now March has come in like a lamb as well. I fell down a few steps so I didn’t walk as much as I should have this winter. I put on a few more pounds. I am still saving up to buy a bike…so far I have saved $0….oh, well…I bought an unplanned farm share for this year, so I will call that an investment since I will get $50 more value for what I paid. I also had to buy 4  new tires and other car repairs. Now my car is much safer and rides much smoother. Otherwise I have been busy working on my Ebay, I went to the auction last week. I babysat my grandson Monday, so his dad could go to the dentist. I have been taking my youngest son out for driving lessons. I also spend time at my boyfriend’s.

In spite of all the fun and important stuff that I have to take up my time. (and trying to keep up with housecleaning) I have been busy on twitter, trying to stay informed on #theResistance. I can’t wait until dumpster is impeached, resigns, or expires. #resist

Link To My Ebay Store…if it works

I have been gone so long from WordPress, I feel like I need the 101 class again…..I have a new camera. I dropped my other one, too many times, it stopped working.  I will have new and exciting pictures soon…I hope.  I also am trying to step up the Ebay listings to 250…so far I have 44. If this works, here is the link:   sign up to follow my ebay store

Five Years Blogging

img_5669

I am so sorry for really going missing in action this year. I have been going out of my mind, trying to get a handle on my anti-Trump facebook postings. I spend way too much time and energy trying to educate people of his many personality disorders that make him unfit to even be considered as a candidate. I have tried very hard to not let it bother me, but I would rather sacrifice my energy now making sure he does not get into office. If any of my followers truly think he is a great guy feel free to unfollow me. My own family might vote for him, and that might explain my deep seated life long mental issues.

So onto the positive things I have done the past few months! I am still with the same boyfriend I met through plenty of fish. I think he is perfect for me. I hope he always feels the same way about me. My two grandchildren are growing up fast. My granddaughter just got back from a family trip to Poland. My grandson is starting to walk around on his own. My granddog is almost a year and has calmed down a little bit, but he is so tall and lanky. He reminds me of Clifford the big red dog, only all black. I spent a weekend visiting my mom, and stopped at a few places on the way home. The pic above I believe was at Raquette Lake, NY. I also drove into Sagamore Camp, but I missed the last tour of the year by a couple hours. I drove down a narrow twisty road out of curiosity to see what the Buttermilk Falls sign was all about, but it could not be viewed from the road. It was raining, so I did not feel like walking down the trail alone. I was unprepared to do any walking as well.

Next month is my last car payment! It has been a long million years paying off a new car loan…lol. I will never do that again, live and learn. I had the car for one year before I had my stroke. Before my stroke, I had to take on a second job or work overtime to pay for the car payment. My plans for the following month are to seriously look at getting myself a bike. I hope it will be a two wheeler, that I can lift onto a car carrier by myself. I don’t mind if I need a special pedal attachment for my one foot to stay on. I am more confident that my affected hand and arm will not get in the way too much, but I will find out.

My garden went neglected once the temps were more than I could bear and the rain barrel went dry from lack of rain. I also saw a large snake…lol. Next year, I will have my container veggies closer to the rain barrel/house and just have my flowers/perennials out where I had my garden. I neglected my whole yard with proper care. My lengths to avoid direct sunlight were met with the arrival of the evening mosquitoes. I did manage to make it all year without a letter from the town telling me my grass was too long. I wonder if that person who complained died or moved away? Anyway, it is ironic to me, since in my opinion my yard has looked the worse condition ever this year…lol. Fuck them, I am the one that has to suffer knowing I own it.  Maybe next year will be my dream of the yard being covered in stones and gardens.

Where Have I Been For Nine Days?

IMG_5209

I have been around. Somewhere between the funk of dealing with a teenage dropout and elation of a relationship that has not soured yet. The weather has been above freezing, so I took my dog for a ride for a few not too bad days.

The blogging 101 class has ended. I feel like a dropout of sorts myself. I burned out reading all the blogs of my classmates. Comparing mine to theirs was like comparing a crumpled brown paper bag to smooth and sleek luxurious gilded wrap. Mine was the paper bag, even if I smooth a few wrinkles, it shows the flaws.

 

My 800th Post

IMG_20160119_213951

I deserve a Chihuly chandelier, but keep me away from it, fragile glass and I do not mix.

I want to keep this post totally about me, taking a break from Blogging 101. I went to the casino that is about one mile from my home for the first time last night. I had a date with the guy I met on plenty of fish just over a week ago. This was our fourth date. Neither one of us gamble, neither one of us stepped a foot inside before despite driving by it many times. We ate at a restaurant and left.

I plan on going back as often as I can just to walk around, it is so big and out of the weather. There is plenty of lounge chairs for me to sit in if my legs hurt of if I get too wobbly. There is a covered parking garage that is free to park! Thank you Native Americans. I need to get into walking shape in just over 40 days I am doing the American Heart Association 3 mile Walk. This walk I did last year, but I barely made it. If I can get out of the driveway with my car, I hope to spend at least 1/2 hour walking around. I really do not gamble, not much anyway. I plan on getting my players club card. I will take advantage if they have any free play. I will also wear it on a lanyard so I look like I belong there. I also will support them on occasion by buying a treat at the snack bar. I am not a total freeloader.

I did not have anything special planned for my 800th post. I just wanted to mark the occasion. I don’t think I have ever kept track of 800 anything. I technically did not keep track of my posts, WordPress did. Thank you WordPress for the free platform.

I read until my eyes bled

I have completed my assignment for blogging 101, tis the 3rd day. I added 5 new tags to my reader search, I then subscribed to 5 blogs I found because of my tags. I actually subscribed to 6, plus the millions of bloggers from my class I subscribed to. The ones I added from reader all came from my tag search of boondocking. I did a whole lot of reading today. I can not get enough of how people are already doing what I want to be doing.

I also popped onto plenty of fish and read a few profiles. There is actually a guy that listed he likes rocks….I wanted to tell him my email address was igneousidol to show how much I love rocks too. I held back, because I am trying to be non-aggressive and let the guys make the first move. Too bad the only ones that did today, just said hello and were ugly smokers. That is two strikes against them. They did not read my profile, and I can’t be around smokers.

I also took Ashley for a ride in the car today. It is her gotcha day. It was too cold to walk with her in the woods. I did drive by a new spot I want to check out on a nicer day. I also took two loads of wet laundry to the laundry mat to dry. My small house gets smaller when every doorway has clothes hanging up to dry.

I signed up to go to trivia night tomorrow. I hope I make it  I am supposed to go to a meetup on Friday too. I hope we have the weekend off from blogging U.

I changed My Blog Title and Tagline

This is day two of WordPress’s Blogging University Blogging101. Our assignment was to change the name and tagline to fit the purpose of our individual blogs. I think my blog has evolved over the years from being just a diversion from boredom to becoming a chronicle or legacy of my blip in time.

I might brainstorm a better title and tagline sometime in the future. This is what I have come up with for now.

I looked over some random writings I have done in a notebook the past month or so. I have my own version of a word cloud going on. I will try to make an actual word cloud someday. I have things I wrote while in a deep funk. I wrote daily goals to keep myself on track. Of course shortly after writing they were cast aside. Here are a few nuggets;

“Staying positive is tiring”

“I don’t know why, why I am I not in on the secret” (this is both directly and indirectly related to the concept in the book “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne)….this I wrote because I feel I was never guided towards a positive, happy, abundance seeking existence…it took me over 50 years to realize I was going the wrong way. I have a hard time explaining what I truly mean by this. I want to guide my son back to his happy self as he was when he was young. I see him as a more extreme version of my former self….I don’t wish that path on anyone. It is self defeating. I hope to make my other two children understand this too. We are not the worker bees, we are the kings and queens.

The pathetic poem I wrote while in the downward ride of my rollercoaster life;

Don’t Live An Empty Lonely Life

Living up to other’s expectations, is the quickest way to push you down.  One minute you hear praise, take a bow, wear a crown. Then life goes on and yours abruptly stops. The cycle repeats, it happens at work, at home, while rolling in the clover, you wake up one day and find your life is half over. Everything you invested did not help you learn, fuck the takers, and take your turn. Help yourself, be selfish, you can’t help others until you help yourself. Tattered clothes, teary eyes, a dog with nails that curve as they grow. [feel] This empty life with no where to go. No one to love, no one to share, no one knows, no one cares. Your personality hidden, too embarrassed, bed ridden.

Here is a list of some of my name change brainstorming…..Brain Blips, Am I There Yet?, The Legacy of _____, From the mythical (rest unfinished)

Here is my brainstorm list of taglines…..In  search of more love using less brains (really lol), Year after year, wish you were here (don’t tell pink floyd), The legacy of my long search yada yada, I am sending vibrations out to the universe (what the hell was I smoking), This is IT! This moment in time, my only chance, Dear Universe

Here is what I did today, some laundry plus made my son put his away. Took the dog to the vet to get her blood test, meds refill and nails clipped. It is her gotcha day tomorrow, we have loved her for 8 years, so she is at least 9 years old. I think I will give her canned pumpkin for a treat. I gave Luna some coconut oil, to see if her skin bumps would go away…she did not eat it yet, so tomorrow I will melt it and drizzle on her food. I spent some time reading other bloggers posts, and liking and subscribing their blogs. I spilled some sauce eating dinner on the new shirt my sister gave me for Christmas. This is why I don’t have good stuff…lol. I made what I called double chalupas with spinach and cheddar and salsa. They were yummy, but messy even with two tortillas. I just made up the name chalupa or stole it from Taco Bell….mine have low sodium. except for the cheese and zero meat.

 

“who I am and why I’m here”

My first assignment for blogging 101,  I am hopefully going to learn how to do this best finally.

First of all I am here in blogland to share my story of recovering from a stroke. I had three strokes by the time I was 47. The last one left me paralyzed and numb on one side, and a whole lot of messed up cognition issues that screw with a “normal” life but are not measured or even of interest to doctors (none that I have seen). I don’t want to be known solely as a pitiful disabled person that sometimes wets her pants. My mind still has clarity of many things, I still yearn to live the life I want and believe I was made for.

I have been a single parent on and off for almost 8 years. I am still searching for my soulmate. I share tales of my life as a grandmother, mother to a depressed teen, struggles of living on social security, my quest to be in tune with the Universe, my selling of vintage items, my attempts at humor and poetry, my gardening with one hand, cooking and baking low sodium foods, and more everyday life.

I signed up for blogging101 because I felt the need to take my blog up several notches. I need new ideas, constant reminders to keep it positive, and most of all I need technical help in inserting (that’s what she said…lol) and linking. Until I started blogging, all my writing was old school pen and paper with scribbled notes in the margins, scratched out lines, circled words and renumbering paragraphs. After all the physical effort the paper ended up in the trash or recycled, because they were either for a class I took or letters to former one sided loves. My thoughts stored perpetually in cyberspace might be the only legacy of mine that live on beyond my time on earth.

I went out again!

IMG_1518

I went to play pool, instead of dancing. I had a good time, then we went out to eat afterwards. I am sure I will be swelling up from the overabundance of sodium. I will stay home and detox for a few days. I need to rest up too.

I met a woman that had a stroke and did not know it for 8 years. We swapped stories of how we could not read and other deficits. She does not have any physical deficits except for balance issues and her foot turning in. I told her there was another stroke survivor in our group as well. I also listened to a women talk about going to school to be a life coach. She told part of her story of her low point in life and why she wanted to be a life coach.

In all there were 13 – 18 single people over 40 that came out to either eat or play pool. Driving home I thought about why so many people are still single. It is a great group, a good way not to stay home alone.

Happy New Year 2016!

IMG_0082

Another old, bad blurry pic.

My legs are sore from dancing. That is a good, positive thing. It means I did not stay home and hide out. I went out, I danced badly but happy to be alive and able to stand upright. Several people told me to smile, which I basically tried to ignore. They have no idea how happy I was on the inside.

While I was pulling into the parking lot, I almost drove straight into the ditch by miscalculating which side of the marker the entrance was on. I was scared for a second, then very glad I avoided that mistake. People stay home on New Years Eve for many reasons. In the future, the only reason I will stay home is to host my own party. I hope to go out as many times as I can this year to dance and have fun.

As I was getting my son pizza before I left, the guy at the pizza shop commented on how my son was so quiet when he came in. He said he always tried to get him to say hello at least. I talked to my son about this when I got home. I hope he does not grow up as shy and socially inept as me.